Happy New Year!

To anyone who happens to stumble onto this blog...

Man v/s Woman : Some Equations n' Statistics

Romance Mathematics
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

Office Arithmetic
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

Shopping Math
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

General Equations & Statistics
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

Happiness
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Longevity
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Propensity To Change
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

Discussion Technique
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

And the argument continues… Sigh!!

Bonus: How To Stop People From Bugging You About Getting Married
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Effective Communication!

What is Effective Communication??

Jack and Max are walking from religious service. Jack wonders whether it would be all right to smoke while praying.

Max replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?"

So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks, “Priest, may I smoke while I pray?"

But the Priest says, "No, my son, you may not. That's utter disrespect to our religion."

Jack goes back to his friend and tells him what the good Priest told him.

Max says, "I'm not surprised. You asked the wrong question. Let me try."

And so Max goes up to the Priest and asks, "Priest, may I pray while I smoke?"

To which the Priest eagerly replies, "By all means, my son. By all means."

Moral: The reply you get depends on the question you ask.

For Example: Can I work on this project while I'm on vacation?
(Any Answers?!?)